Poland Spring Water Suing Senator Marco Rubio For Defamation

"Rubio" "Poland" "Springs" "water" "defamation" "SOTU" "Republican"

The water bottling giant Poland Spring Water out of Maine is said to be suing Senator Marco Rubio (R-FL) for alleged defamation with his use of a bottle of water which came from the company.

During the Republican response to the State of the Union Tuesday evening, Senator Rubio took an extremely awkward sip of water from a miniature Poland Spring Water bottle to quench his supposed thirst. Poland Spring feels that this terrible display of public speaking amidst a speech full of “half-truths” makes the company look as though they are in support of the Senator and his “shameful attempt at looking legitimately intelligent.”

In a press release from Poland Spring Water it states:

 “We here at Poland Spring Water are in no way affiliated with Senator Marco Rubio. His shameful attempt at looking legitimately intelligent was a gross injustice to the American people viewing his speech. During his remarks filled with half-truths he took a sip of water from one of our bottles that not only made him look awkward and foolish, but it also made our company look ridiculous. We did not give him written consent to sip from that bottle, and in requital we must seek the damages we are owed due to such vast negligence of our product without permission.”

Senator Rubio’s office could not be reached for comment at this time, but we here at Free Wood Post will keep you updated as this story unfolds.

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